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[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: Lines Written In Kensignton Gardens
Author: CaitlinFairchild
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Explicit
Genre/Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Post S3
Length: 48:20

Summary:

Thirty-five was the established boundary, Sherlock decided after extensive calculations. He would be dead by thirty-five. That was the kind of man he was. That was the kind of life he lived.

At thirty-four, a year before his appointed rendezvous with oblivion, Sherlock met a man. Nobody special, or so he thought, an ordinary man--who soon proved extraordinary, a man who killed without hesitation to protect a life Sherlock cared nothing about.

***

This is the story of how Sherlock Holmes lived long enough to grow old.


MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - I Lived (acoustic cover by Carrollton Band) - OneRepublic

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[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: The Prince and the Soldier
Author: PrettyArbitrary
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Explicit
Genre/Tags: Medieval AU, Dubious Consent, Master/Servant
Length: 50:45

Summary: How characteristic, John had thought the first time the prince bedded him, that Sherlock would choose the most forbidden of passions to pursue.

MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - Poison Prince (Holly Kirby cover) - Amy Macdonald

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[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: Sugar Me Sweet
Author: penumbra
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Mature
Genre/Tags: different first meeting, strip tease, frottage
Length: 25:48

Summary: “Let’s get started, shall we?” Sherlock says as he sheds his coat. A black, diaphanous shirt hangs loose on his shoulders, clings tight to his abdomen. A pair of studded, leather trousers like a second skin. They complement the curve of his plump arse and emphasize the length of his outrageously long legs. Powerful thighs. Muscular calves and...John’s not entirely sure how Sherlock got himself in them, but he’s not complaining. On the contrary. A bit distracted by the idea of him removing them, honestly. Peeling them off, and he’d have to go slow. May even need a little help.

MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - Pour Some Sugar On Me (acoustic) - Def Leppard

xdiorix: (Default)
[personal profile] xdiorix
Title: Fairy Shoe Person
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] gladdecease
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: G
Fandom: How I Met Your Mother, Sesame Street
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: Lily's found out what Barney's job is.
Length: 0:41
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

[(10+10) + (10+10)] x 1= 40 points


Title: Remember This
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] storiesfortravellers
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: G
Fandom: Mulan
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: 50 years after Mulan's great victories, some things have changed (not everything).
Length: 0:49
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

(10+10) x 1= 20 points


Title: Irreconcilable
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] meridian_rose
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: T
Fandom: Anthropomorfic
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: For the prompt Fandom meta: AO3, Fanfiction.net, irreconcilable differences
Length: 0:51
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

(10+10) x 1= 20 points


Title: Only One
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] meridian_rose
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: T
Fandom: Highlander, James Bond
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: For the prompt: Highlander/James Bond (any), Bond, he does/will outlive them all
Length: 0:48
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

[(5+10) + (5+10)] x 1= 30 points (Skyfall is on the represented fandoms list, but as this is about the larger James Bond franchise rather than a specific movie, I counted it for 10 points)


Title: Lies
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] meridian_rose
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: T
Fandom: Arrow
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: For the 3 sentence ficathon prompt Arrow, Tommy, surrounded by lies
Length: 0:39
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

(10+10) x 1= 20 points


Title: Beware
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] meridian_rose
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: G
Fandom: Fairy Tales
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: For the three sentence ficathon Dec 2013-Jan 2014 prompt Fairy tales or myths, things to never trust
Length: 0:39
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

(10+10) x 1= 20 points


Title: Daytime Drama
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] meridian_rose
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: G
Fandom: Sherlock, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: For the prompt: Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Sherlock, Spike & Sherlock, daytime soaps
Length: 0:31
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

[(1+5) + (5+5)] x 1= 16 points

Total Points: 166 points


Could I get fandom tags for James Bond and Sesame Street?

After-wise

Apr. 30th, 2016 12:25 am
consulting_smartass: (Default)
[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: After-wise
Author: cathedral_carver
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Genre/Tags: old age, dementia, true love
Length: 39:20

Summary: My name is John Hamish Watson and I am 74 years old and I must wear clean pants every day. No exceptions.

MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - Time After Time (Eva Cassidy cover) - Cyndi Lauper

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[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: Love and Other Deaths
Author: lotherington
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Genre/Tags: snapshots, declarations of love
Length: 14:44

Summary: ‘I don’t love you,’ Sherlock whispers against John’s shoulder, his dark hair curling around the white, stretched skin of John’s scar, the top of his arm.

MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - All of Me (Luciana Zogbi cover) - John Legend

opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong


Title: Four People Who Never Became Spirit Detectives (And One Who Became Something Else)
Author: chaos_harmony
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Yu Yu Hakusho/Hunger Games/The O.C./Sherlock
Pairings: Gen
Rating: Teen
Length: 26:31
Size: 24.5 MB
Music:
Sayonara Bye Bye by Mawatari Matsuko
Tenuous Winners & Returning Home by James Newton Howard
The O.C. Theme Song
the BBC Sherlock Theme Song
Booby trap by James Newton Howard
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: Yuusuke isn't the only spirit detective in the world. Five AUs.

Links: mp3
Archive Link

Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3

POINTS: ((5+10+10+1) + (10+10+10+5) * 3 = 183

MODS: I think I need a tag for "fandom:The OC"
consulting_smartass: (Default)
[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: the joy you longed to know
Author: hudders-and-hiddles
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Genre/Tags: angst, pining Sherlock, second person POV, poetic prose
Length: 15:00

Summary: 

You’re fine.
 
You work. You work. You work. You work.
 
You bounce from crime scene to crime scene, no patience for the in-between timewasting of ordinary lives. You fill the days, the hours, the minutes and seconds and nanoseconds with case after case after case. You try to ignore the silent itch slithering in your veins, crawling beneath your skin, burning in the crook of your arm. You hold everyone at arm’s length, wrapping yourself in condescension, wearing it like a coat, the collar pulled up high to protect your own too-vulnerable neck.


MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - Cry No More (Live) - Vaults

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[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: in the ether, in the heavens
Author: darcylindbergh
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Mature
Genre/Tags: angst, second person POV, poetic prose
Length: 11:57

Summary: you think, if he were there, I would find him.

MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)
 
Pre/Post Music - Half-life (live) - Imogen Heap

Notes

Apr. 25th, 2016 12:19 am
consulting_smartass: (Default)
[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: Notes
Author: Kryptaria
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: General Audiences
Genre/Tags: Fluff
Length: 24:00

Summary: It had begun innocuously enough, when Sherlock had found a scrap of paper under the armchair that had become reserved solely for John’s use. Sherlock Holmes, it read, with 221B Baker Street underneath.

MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - Latch (acoustic cover by JRAquinomusic) - Disclosure

chasingriver: (Default)
[personal profile] chasingriver
The DI and the Spy 2

Title:
The DI and the Spy 2
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] chasingriver [tumblr.com profile] chasingriversong
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] chasingriver
Fandom: Sherlock
Pairing: Mycroft Holmes/Greg Lestrade
Rating: E
Length: 07:31:45

Formats and links: (alternate links can be found on the AO3 post)


Summary
: After their unconventional introduction in The DI and the Spy, Mycroft decides to accept Greg's offer of "running lessons".

Note: This podfic is a direct sequel to The DI and the Spy, and certain plot elements will be confusing if you haven't read or listened to it.

Warnings: none
Text: The DI and the Spy 2

points: (1+5)*20=120

consulting_smartass: (Default)
[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: In the Name of Science
Author: maybemalapert (laconicisms)
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Explicit
Genre/Tags: Tentacles, AU, Consent Issues, Sherlock is a Squid
Length: 18:38

Summary: Written for this prompt: Sherlock is a sea creature and one day encounters an unsuspecting swimmer/diver/angler/whatever John. Of course, Sherlock fucks John with his tentacles.

MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - Octopus's Garden (piano cover by Calikokat) - The Beatles

code_switch: (Default)
[personal profile] code_switch
Title: Burn the Heart Out of You (with Sympathy)
Author: 5NinjaCat
Reader: codeswitch
Rating: Teen and up
Fandom: The Kingkiller Chronicles, Sherlock
Pairings: Gen
Summary: Sherlock Holmes, a sympathist studying at the University, and his friend the Medica student John Watson explore the Underthing to find the reason behind missing University students. There they encounter Jim Moriarty for the first time, another fellow University student with dark intentions... And hints of something big that's going to happen.

Length: 17:09
Download: mp3 at Mediafire

Points: [1+5+10+10] x2 = 52

Title: Friends (and Grams) Protect People
Author: 5NinjaCat
Reader: codeswitch
Rating: Teen and up
Fandom: The Kingkiller Chronicles, Sherlock
Pairings: Gen
Summary: After an encounter with Jim Moriarty in the Underthing, Sherlock forges a gram for protection from malfeasance. But perhaps grams and sympathy aren't the only things a person needs for protection.
Length: 11:32

Download: mp3 at Mediafire

Points: [1+5+10+10] x2 = 52
xdiorix: (Default)
[personal profile] xdiorix
Title: Curiouser and Curiouser
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] rabidsamfan
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: G
Fandom: Sherlock and Curious George
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: Man meets monkey.
Length: 3:29
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

[(10+1) + (10+5)] x 1= 26 points

May I have a fandom tag for Curious George, please?
xdiorix: (Default)
[personal profile] xdiorix
Title: Tea and Bitching
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] gardnerhill
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: Not Rated
Fandom: Doctor Who, Sherlock, Elementary, and Torchwood
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: Some things are universal - like white male privilege.
Length: 5:14
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

[(1+1+5+5) + (5+5+10+5)] x 1= 37 points


Title: Tea and Bitching 2: The Kvetch Continues
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] gardnerhill
Reader: [archiveofourown.org profile] blackglass
Rating: Not Rated
Fandom: Doctor Who, Sherlock, Elementary, Torchwood, Sleepy Hollow, and The Thin Blue Line
Pairings: None, gen
Summary: The drinking circle has gotten bigger.
Length: 8:48
Download: Right click and save as an mp3. (Thanks to paraka for hosting!)

Streaming available at AO3.

[(1+1+5+5+5+10) + (5+5+10+5+10+10)] x 1= 72 points

Total points: 109 points

I need tags for The Thin Blue Line, please!
consulting_smartass: (Default)
[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: Measuring Damage With the Fujita Scale
Author: teahigh
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Genre/Tags: First Time, Vacation, Storms
Length: 32:30

Summary: John goes back into town, into the storm, and Sherlock realises he forgot to say, “I just want to be alone with you.

MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - Blown Away (acoustic cover by Izzy Wicks) - Carrie Underwood

fresne: Circe (Default)
[personal profile] fresne
Title: A Study in Azure
Writer/Reader: fresne
Fandom: Sherlock BBC
Warnings: Omegaverse
Pairings: Irene Adler/Jim Moriarty, Sherlock Holmes/John Watson,  Irene Adler/Sherlock Holmes
Length: 4:56
Summary: 
John Watson knew when he somehow fell into an alternate universe where he was a Bond Omega dating Robin Hood, or possibly if Molly was to be believed a demiurge of chaotic good. That he liked it was unreasonable, irrational, and a bit not good.
 
Sherlock Holmes knew the precise moment when he pair bonded. Three retorts and a biological impulse.
 
Irene Adler knew when love died. She spent all her days plotting to salt and burn the earth where it still walked.

Links to podfic chapter by chapter
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Cover for a Study in Azure

[1] + [1 + 5+5] *9 = 108


consulting_smartass: (Default)
[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: as I let you rewrite gravity
Author: 1electricpirate
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandoms: BBC Sherlock, Harry Potter
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Explicit
Genre/Tags: Potterlock, Wizard!John, Muggle!Sherlock, AU
Length: 1:48:58

Summary:

“He’s not so much a man, you know,” John says, without really meaning to. “Not so much a man as a force of nature. Like... like gravity, or... or...”

“Like Magic,” Charlie supplies.

“Yes, exactly. Like Magic. As inescapable as Magic.”

In which Sherlock is jealous, John is surprisingly oblivious, and Charlie saves the day.


MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - Interstellar Theme Music Tribute - The Indian Jam Project

consulting_smartass: (Default)
[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: to see you shift
Author: 1electricpirate
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandoms: BBC Sherlock, Harry Potter
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Mature
Genre/Tags: Potterlock, Wizard!John, Muggle!Sherlock, AU
Length: 1:24:16

Summary:

“How does it work? There has to be some mechanism behind it, surely. How does it work?”

“How does it … Magic, Sherlock, it’s magic. It doesn’t have a how, it just is. It just … works.”

In which Sherlock is a greedy, nosey parker and John has the patience of a saint. Vignettes from the process of acclimatisation.


MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - BBC Sherlock Theme - Indian Jam Project

consulting_smartass: (Default)
[personal profile] consulting_smartass

Title: you are a paradigm
Author: 1electricpirate
Reader: consulting_smartass
Fandoms: BBC Sherlock, Harry Potter
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: Mature
Genre/Tags: Potterlock, Wizard!John, Muggle!Sherlock, AU
Length: 1:12:27

Summary:

Sometimes, only sometimes, when Sherlock is very far away and absolutely guaranteed not to return for at least three hours, John sits on the sofa and lets the tea make itself.

In which John is (reluctantly) a wizard, Mycroft is (apparently) omniscient, and Sherlock is (surprisingly) oblivious.


MediaFire (mp3/m4b)
SoundCloud (mp3)

Pre/Post Music - Harry Potter Music Indian Tribute - Indian Jam Project

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