hananobira: (Default)
[personal profile] hananobira


Summary:
In Which Karkat Vantas Finds His Ashen Quadrant Filling Itself, Somewhat Against His Wishes, Leaving Him With A Small Mountain Of What The Fuck Do I Do Now?

An exploration of what "ashen" looks like, being romance, platonic, black, and conciliatory all at once.

Notes and acknowledgements: Gratitude to gaudior for permission to record this podfic, and to Paraka and Jinjurly for hosting!

*****


Original Fic: http://archiveofourown.org/works/1024461
Author: gaudior
Rating: Teen
Warnings: None
Pairing: Kanaya Maryam & Karkat Vantas & Eridan Ampora, Karkat Vantas & Gamzee Makara
Length: 00:58:04

Paraka: MP3 (84 MB) or M4B (57 MB)
AO3: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10633974
Audiofic Archive: Check back later.

opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong


Title: Covalent Bonds Podbook
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Length: 7:00:34
Size: 197.8MB
Cover: Opalsong
Summary:
Wherein, Having Beaten A Game, All Players Are Taken Back To The Same, Worst Available Universe, With Species Changes To Match For Those Who Did Not Match Beforehand.

In short: You're all trolls now, welcome to Alternia.

Podbook Link: Podbook

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Covalent
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: John/Karkat, John<>Vriska
Rating: Mature
Length (total): 1:38:53
Music: Bonds of Sea and Fire from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots & Sprite by Asuka Kureru
Summary:

-- tentacleTherapist [TT] has joined memo CALLING ALL JACKASSES --

CG: THANK LITTLE JEGUS AND ALL HIS WIGGLER-EATING ELVES. WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING STATUS.
CA: oh great and wwhich human evven is that again
TT: Oh, please. We both know perfectly how well you remember me, Mr. Ampora.
TT: My status is, if you will permit the bad joke, wet and horny.
CG: MY GANDERBULBS JUST IMPLODED FROM GROSS BY PROXY. WHAT THE CROTCHBLISTERING *FUCK*, LALONDE?
TT: As in, I have just emerged from what is either a recuperacoon or a fairly good mock-up, and there are protrusions attached to my skull that I am inclined to believe would be candy-corn-colored.
CG: ... OH. YEAH, VERY AMUSING. I AM VERY AMUSED. HERE IS A PICTOGRAPHIC REPRESENTATION OF MY MIRTH. |:B

Part 1 of the Covalent Bonds series

Chapter Links [length; size]:
Chapter 1 [29:39; 41.2MB]
Chapter 2 [33:16; 25.5MB]
Chapter 3 [35:58; 49.9MB]

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Side B
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Gen
Rating: Teen
Length: 13:54
Size: 19.6MB
Music: The Blue Traveler from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots
Summary:

TA: gue22 what ii found.
AC: :33 < tg-or-boy-tt's hive? *ac guesses*
CG: IT HAD BETTER BE A DOUCHE IN SHADES.
TA: iit'2 ...
TA: iiiiiit'2 ......
TA: two douche2 iin 2hade2.
--
Meanwhile, on the internet. Takes place during Covalent's second chapter.

Part 2 of the Covalent Bonds series

Link: MP3

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Week One
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Rose/Feferi, Jade/Gamzee, Eridan/Roxy
Rating: Teen
Length (total): 50:35
Music: My Village is Number One from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots & Sprite by Asuka Kureru
Summary:

-- tentacleTherapist [TT] opened memo Bearded Wizard Slash on board FUCK PARADOX SPACE IN EVERY SINGLE BLACK HOLE: THE MOVIE --

TT: This shall serve as a repository for my magnum opus.
TT: I tease. This is a chronicle of my early days of trollhood.
TG: yes plz tell us everything about you playing ye olde alien trouser flute

-- tentacleTherapist [TT] banned turntechGodhead [TG] from memo Bearded Wizard Slash --

TT: I would never dare to steal the thunder from your own memo, dear brother.
--
Collection of logs to bridge the first week after Covalent.
1) Rose & various; Feferi
2) Dirk & Tavros, Dirk & Dave
3) Jade & Gamzee
4) Roxy & Eridan
5) Dirk & Roxy & ??

Part 3 of the Covalent Bonds series

Chapter Links [length; size]:
Chapter 1 [13:43; 10.4MB]
Chapter 2 [8:55; 7.0MB]
Chapter 3 [13:36; 10.4MB]
Chapter 4 [9:18; 7.2MB]
Chapter 5 [5:03; 3.8MB]

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Oasis Reunion
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Jane<>Dirk
Rating: Teen
Length: 1:17:24
Size: 106.8MB
Music: Shevat, the Wind is Calling from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots & Sprite by Asuka Kureru
Summary: In Which Jane Crocker Is Getting Used To Being A Troll (No She Isn't,) A Party Gets Crashed But Is Then Put Back On Its Rails, And Jane Totally Does Not Pale Hook Up With Dirk Strider (Yes She Does.)

Contains Several Shameless Public Pappings, Ashen Fuckery (Seriously Jade Stop,) Karkat Being A Pale Guru, And One List Of Raunchy Troll Porn Titles.

Part 4 of the Covalent Bonds series

Link: MP3

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: On The Outside Looking In
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Dirk<>Jane, Karkat/Jade/Gamzee, Eridan/Rose/Feferi
Rating: Teen
Length (total): 1:14:45
Music: Premonition from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots & Sprite by Asuka Kureru
Summary: You can't help but like your upstairs neighbor, even though he's a little shit who turns his music up way too loud at odd hours. He's this plucky little rustie with amazing horns, he knows how to slice and dice a guy in like two seconds, and once when you broke your thermal hull during the dim season he was neighborly enough to ask his palebro to fix it for you, even though ain't no way to get to know him in the course of normal conversation.

Also, when his featherbeast lusus died... You weren't there when it happened but afterwards he was just like a little robo-dude, rambling on automatic behind his facade and not even knowing it was cracked to hell and back, pretending like it was just a fact of life and he didn't mind.

So yeah okay you are vaguely pale on your upstairs neighbor.
--
How does a normal troll with no clue that the game ever existed see an ex-player, anyway? Especially one who used to be an alien. Hopefully a series of various outsider POVs.

Part 5 of the Covalent Bonds series

Chapter Links [length; size]:
Chapter 1 [26:45; 37.2MB]
Chapter 2 [24:36; 34.3MB]
Chapter 3 [23:24; 32.6MB]

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Well, That Was Pointless
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Gen
Rating: General Audiences
Length: 17:56
Size: 14.0MB
Music: Grahf, Conqueror of Darkness from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots & Sprite by Asuka Kureru
Summary:
-- undyingUmbrage [uu] started trolling centaursTesticle [CT] --

uu: WHAT THE FuCK IS uP. WITH THIS CHAT CLIENT.
uu: TROLLING IS FOR LOSERS. WHERE IS THE JEERING OPTION.
CT: D --> I beg your pardon
CT: D --> Who the heck are you and why are you on my chumproll in the first place with your l00dicrous and despicable hemoanonymity
uu: I COuLD ASK YOu THE EXACT SAME FuCKING THING.
uu: BuT I WON'T. BECAuSE I'M NOT A DuMBASS.
uu: AND I ALREADY ASKED DIRK WHO THE FuCK YOu WERE. AND WHY YOu WERE ON MY CHuMPROLL.

Part 6 of the Covalent Bonds series

Link: MP3

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: See How It Goes
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Gen
Rating: Teen
Length: 5:24
Size: 7.9MB
Music: Shattering the Egg of Dreams from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots
Summary:
-- terminallyCapricious [TC] started trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] --
TC: so yeah hi

It's hard to believe his eyes at first. Karkat has seen Gamzee's handle lit up here and there in the last weeks -- often winking off a couple minutes after he goes online himself.

He's been okay with it, kind of, in not-really-okay, afraid-to-make-it-worse ways. He's not really feeling like he has digested the last meeting they had, like he has figured out what he thinks and is ready to tackle more. But for Mister If I Pretend It's Not Here It Will Go Poof Somehow to contact him first?

Part 7 of the Covalent Bonds series

Link: MP3

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Rules of Engaging with a Chest Werewolf
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: John/Karkat, John<>Vriska
Rating: Teen
Length: 30:01
Size: 23.3MB
Music: One Who Bares Fangs at God from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots & Sprite by Asuka Kureru
Summary:

EB: so... i hear you're back with gamzee? seriously???
CG: OH, *YOU* WANT TO HAVE THIS CONVERSATION. YOU, WHO ARE OBVIOUSLY A CONNOISSEUR IN ALL MATTERS PERTAINING TO TROLLHOOD AND MOIRALLEGIANCE. WHO AM I TO DISAPPOINT!
CG: SO, I HEAR YOU'RE WITH *VRISKA*? SERIOUSLY???
EB: ...
EB: on second thought, let's talk about movies.
CG: YEAH, WE MIGHT ACCIDENTALLY FALL ON EACH OTHER ALL CLAWS OUT OTHERWISE, AND THEN IT'LL BE HELL HAVING TO MAKE OUT.
CG: MAKE UP.
CG: I MEANT MAKE UP. FUCK. TYPO. HAHA.

Part 8 of the Covalent Bonds series

Link: MP3

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Three Sweeps In
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Gen
Rating: Teen
Length: 25:54
Size: 19.6MB
Music: Broken Mirror from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots
Summary: Three sweeps after the end of the game, Terezi finally gets to the Legislacerator academy. She didn't know how she expected it to go, but not like that.

Part 9 of the Covalent Bonds series

Link: MP3

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: A Pirate's Life for Me
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Meenah/Kankri, Damara<>Meenah
Rating: Mature
Length: 25:46
Size: 35.9MB
Music: October Mermaid from Xenogears Light
Cover: Opalsong
Art: Homestuck Trolls & Kids Seamless Fabric Pattern by Ladyboots
Summary:

AA: tell me about kankri, i tell you about me
CC: ...
CC: codDAMN megido
CC: so did you not want to talk to any of us or
AA: yes
CC: so whats changed now
AA: now is funnier to speak
AA: vomit up your kankri fucking woes so i may laugh into your sea dog face
CC: nice, i can feel some real sympathy flowin from your new typeface, girl.
CC: real friendly there did you wake up beached outside your coon or
AA: i laugh and choke and die if you lucky
AA: tell
CC: urgh fine okay let me just walk up to your harpoon n whine my life aint sharp enough
CC: giving me your word youll tell me where to find you after that?
AA: put a cross in my heart hope you die :D
CC: imma take you at your word and that word as a yes but only because i really need to bitch about that sweater-wrapped tool

Part 10 of the Covalent Bonds series

Link: MP3

Audiofic Archive link: Here

Thanks to Yue_ix for the cover art beta!
Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3
opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong


Title: awake at night
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Karkat<>Gamzee
Rating: Mature
Length: 1:22:46
Size: 63.3MB
Music: Savean by Sarah Brightman
Cover: Opalsong
Warnings: Author chose not to use warnings. And I agree. The warnings kinda ruin the shock of the story. However, if you want them just contact me and I'll give them to you (also you can read the warnings on the rest of the series and they pretty much give it away).
Summary: There are certain expectations in troll society about taking in a freeloader with no place to go, as Dad Egbert finds out when he offers to host two of his son's stranded friends post-game.
Notes: This is a re-pod of awake at night. I last produced it in 2012 and I felt, for consistancy's sake, I should rerecord. It hit me just as hard this time.

Link: MP3

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Everything is beautiful and nothing hurts
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Gen
Rating: Teen
Length: 26:56
Size: 20.5MB
Music: Sunshine Lollipops and Rainbows by Leslie Gore
Cover: Opalsong
Summary:
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] has opened memo on board Everything is beautiful and nothing hurts --

CG: I HAVE A NUMBER OF QUICK ANNOUNCEMENTS TO MAKE BEFORE I GO CRASH IN MY PILE AND SLEEP THE GLORIOUS SLEEP OF THE UNDISTURBED. IF ANY OF YOU ASSHOLES ARE STILL AWAKE, SHUT UP.
CG: ITEM 0.
CG: HUMANS ARE THE BEST.
CG: I AM PROUD I CONTRIBUTED TO YOUR CREATION, HUMANS.

Link: MP3

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Morning After
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Gen
Rating: General Audiences
Length (total): 23:50
Music: Dearly Beloved by Takehiko Yamada
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: After the big drama is all over, John awakens. Hey, aren't Dad and their alien houseguests hiding things from hi -- oooh, pancakes.

Chapter Links [length; size]:
Chapter 1 [9:21; 7.3MB]
Chapter 2 [14:30; 11.2MB]

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Crash Standing
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Davesprite/Karkat, Karkat<>Gamzee, Gamzee/Terezi, Terezi/Dave, Kanaya/Rose
Rating: Mature
Length (total): 14:40:46
Music: The Crow by Dessa
Art: Asuka Kureru
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: It's been eight days since the end of Sburb and Davesprite is not coping especially well.

Podbooks Links:
Part 1 [6:16:25; 177.9MB]
Part 2 [8:29:31; 239.8MB]

Chapter Links [length; size]:
Chapter 1 [26:17; 36.4MB]
Chapter 2 [37:19; 28.8MB]
Chapter 3 [32:26; 45.1MB]
Chapter 4 [56:31; 77.9MB]
Chapter 5 [28:18; 21.8MB]
Chapter 6 [46:15; 34.9MB]
Chapter 7 [31:32; 24.2MB]
Chapter 8 [34:27; 26.5MB]
Chapter 9 [36:09; 49.9MB]
Chapter 10 [47:01; 36.3MB]
Chapter 11 [47:16; 65.2MB]
Chapter 12 [38:53; 53.7MB]
Chapter 13 [42:36; 58.8MB]
Chapter 14 [53:11; 40.4MB]
Chapter 15 [43:35; 60.2MB]
Chapter 16 [57:58; 79.9MB]
Chapter 17 [1:03:53; 88.0MB]
Chapter 18 [1:06:30; 91.6MB]
Chapter 29 [43:38; 67.1MB]
Chapter 20 [47:01; 64.9MB]

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Crash Standing -- What-Ifs and Maybes
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Davesprite/Kanaya, Davesprite/Karkat/Jade, Terezi/Dave
Rating: Teen
Length (total): 23:45
Music: The Crow by Dessa
Art: Asuka Kureru
Cover: Opalsong
Summary:
1. "Byrd," Kanaya says with even more careful enunciation than usual, and that's how you know she's kind of drunk. "I do not wish to impugn on your transcendental broship with John."
--
2. GG: hi byrd can i talk to you???
GG: its not super urgent yet but ahhhh, i really need to talk to you!!!
GG: byrd featherbutt strider!
--
3. Terezi has a problem with Dave's shower. A very grave problem. Dave chivalrously undertakes to fix it.
--
4. Chapter 13 from Bro's POV.
--
Collection of ficlets that might turn out to be canon for the main fic and deliberately branching-off plotlines.
Will not make sense without having read Crash Standing.

Chapter Links [length; size]:
Chapter 1: Kanaya & Byrd drunken conciliatory cuddles [8:20; 11.8MB]
Chapter 2: Byrd/Karkat/Jade pesterlog shenanigans - non-canon [6:53; 9.8MB]
Chapter 3: dave/terezi, shower ficlet [3:06; 2.6MB]
Chapter 4: Chapter 13 from Bro's POV [5:26; 4.3MB]

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: Daemon Meme - Crash Standing
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Gen
Rating: General Audiences
Length (total): 13:10
Music: Lyra, Roger, & Billy by Alexandre Desplat
Cover: Opalsong
Summary:
Fusion with Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials/the Golden Compass.
--
Karkat doesn't know what to do with his daemon. (None of the trolls do; Terezi hides it a little better but in the week she's been sharing the Striders' apartment Davesprite doesn't count the times he found her sitting in silence on the couch, or in the staircase to the roof, that horrific alligator-mawed, hollow-bellied hound-thing of hers staring back at her with his head on her knee, both trying to make sense of each other.)
It's funny because neither does Davesprite, really.

Chapter Links [length; size]:
Chapter 1 [5:24; 4.3MB]
Chapter 2 [4:03; 3.3MB]
Chapter 3 [3:43; 2.9MB]

Audiofic Archive link: Here



Title: the family you choose Podbook
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Length: 2:51:21
Size: 80.9 MB
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: Complilation of "awake at night", "Everything is beautiful and nothing hurts", "Morning After", "Crash Standing - What-Ifs and Maybes", and "Daemon Meme- Crash Standing"

Podbook Link: Podbook

Audiofic Archive link: TBA


Thanks to Yue_ix for the cover art beta!
Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3
hananobira: (Default)
[personal profile] hananobira
Series Author: Elizabeth Culmer
Fandom: Homestuck
Notes and acknowledgements: Thank you to Elizabeth Culmer for permission to record this story! And love as always to Paraka for hosting. <333

Click here for Part 1.

*****


Part 2:


Summary: Davesprite and Jade talk about everything and nothing, one week into the journey along the yellow yard.

Original Fic: here
Pairing: Davesprite/Jade Harley
Rating: Teen
Warnings: None

Song/Sound Effects:
Dave's text alert from Zedge.net
Typing noise from SoundBible.com

Length: 00:26:27

AO3: here
Paraka: MP3 (37 MB) or M4B (25 MB)
Audiofic Archive: here



*****


Part 3:


Summary: Jade brings Davesprite to LOFAF on a quest to recreate her eclectic bass. Naturally they get derailed by tangents.

Original Fic: here
Pairing: Davesprite/Jade Harley
Rating: Gen
Warnings: None

Length: 00:04:30

AO3: here
Paraka: MP3 (7 MB) or M4B (5 MB)
Audiofic Archive: here



*****


Part 4:


Summary: John has some questions about the repercussions of going God Tier. Davesprite and Jade are less than helpful.

Original Fic: here
Pairing: Gen
Rating: Gen
Warnings: None

Song/Sound Effects:
John's texting noises from Zedge.net and Podbean.com
Typing noise from SoundBible.com

Length: 00:26:27

AO3: here
Paraka: MP3 or M4B (7 MB)
Audiofic Archive: here



*****




BLOOPER REEL!!!
MP3 (4 MB)

hananobira: (Default)
[personal profile] hananobira


Prompt:
What do you do with your own cadaver? I mean, John and Jade may have God-Tier'd, but their dead bodies are still lying there on the Quest Beds. Rose is impaled somewhere on the battlefield, and there those dead Daves all over the place.

You can't just leave your own corpse lying around for three years. It's morbid, not to mention unsanitary. But what do you do? Hurl them into the lava, maybe. Or bury them! But can you hold a funeral for people who have come back to life? Should you?

It's a hell of a thing to deal with when you're thirteen.


Notes and acknowledgements:
Thank you, Elizabeth Culmer, for permission to record this fantastic story! Hugs as always to Paraka and Jinjurly for hosting.

Fandom: Homestuck
Author: Elizabeth Culmer
Original Fic: http://archiveofourown.org/works/461663
Pairing: Gen
Rating: Teen
Warnings: It's about dead bodies. Grief, mourning, seriously twisted humor.
Length: 00:48:00

Paraka: MP3 (66 MB) or M4B (45 MB)
AO3: here
Audiofic Archive: here

hananobira: (Default)
[personal profile] hananobira


Summary: It seemed like a good idea at the time; every group needs to set some ground rules.

Notes and acknowledgements: Thanks to gloss for having blanket permission. And love to Paraka and Jinjurly for hosting.

Original Fic: here
Author: gloss
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairing: Gen
Rating: Teen
Warnings: None
Sound Effects: Bike horn from SoundBible.com
Length: 00:11:43

Paraka: MP3 (16 MB) or M4B (11 MB)
AO3: here
Audiofic Archive: here


I'm currently working on a multi-voice version of this podfic with several of my friends. Check back in a few weeks for the new and improved version!

hananobira: (Default)
[personal profile] hananobira


Summary: Rose has a gift for Kanaya, but she can't find it because of the mess in her room.

Notes and acknowledgements: If you are the author of this orphaned fic and wish to see it taken down, please contact me so we can discuss it.

Thanks to Jinjurly and Paraka for hosting!

Original Fic: here
Author: orphan_account
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairing: Gen
Rating: Gen
Warnings: None
Length: 00:04:51

Paraka: MP3 (7 MB) or M4B (5 MB)
AO3: here
Audiofic Archive: here

Recorded for the "Read Deadpan" square for Podfic BINGO.

opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong


Title: Pale as Moonlight and Kraken Murderbots
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Dave<>Bro, Dave/Terezi/Karkat
Rating: Teen
Length: 1:13:31
Size: 101.2MB
Music: Lollipop (Candyman) by Aqua
Cover: Opalsong
Summary:

TG: ((the place is lousy with robots))
TG: ((a lot of them are rusted and havent had maintenance in however many sweeps since the owner died or was conscripted whatever and the programming gets glitchy as fuck))
TG: ((could be doing anything i get attacked and strifed to within an inch of my life with very real blades that would kill me very real dead if i miss my swing and then suddenly the robot will whirr off and im left in a puddle of my sweat on the floor wondering what the fuck))
CG: SHIT, YEAH, THAT SOUNDS NERVE-WRACKING.
TG: ((and then the pizza drone will get a bad address and randomly drop me five of my favorite on the house))
CG: ... HUH.

--
For this kink meme prompt:
So, seadweller!Bro sees lowblood!Dave and it's pity at first sight. Maybe he's using weird seadweller rituals or maybe he's just being his strange self to court Dave. Unfortunately, Dave has no idea why this finface is constantly in his business. Show me how they become moirails, please. ♦


Links: mp3
Archive Link


Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3
code_switch: (Default)
[personal profile] code_switch
Title: The Lion's Jaws
Author: signalbeam
Reader: codeswitch
Rating: Explicit
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Terezi/Vriska, Kanaya/Vriska
Summary:

Rose said, “If you can believe it—I say it more in recognition of the absurdity than denial of the fact—”

“How do you talk this much when you’re hungover? What does it take to make you quit yapping? God.”

“—our dear friend has a case of amnesia, with no clear cause. Shut up for a moment. Some weeks ago, Terezi agreed to spend a few days at my house for an extended study break. When she arrived three nights ago, she had lost her memory en route in the cab. All she knew was her own name and that she had a destination.” She finished off the glass, set it down, and said, “You should reintroduce yourself, dear.”

 

Length: 1:05:00
Download at Mediafire.

Crossposted to AO3.

Points: [5+10+10] x4 = 100
opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong


Title: Cronus: embrace humanity.
Author: Laylah
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Cronus/Multiple
Rating: Explicit
Length: 43:08
Size: 40.1 MB
Music: Red Dress (THE GLITCH MOB Remix) TV On the Radio by The Glitch Mob
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: You try to dress nice. How do you dress nice for a sex club? You have no fucking idea. But you've got the greaser cool guy look down pretty good, and you think it works for you. You wear your tightest t-shirt. You spend like fifteen minutes in front of the bedroom mirror trying to decide which pair of jeans is the most flattering for your glutes. This is your chance.

Part 1 of the Human Behavior series.

Links: mp3
Series Podbook [2:26:48; 70.3MB]
Archive Link
Series Archive Link




Title: Kankri: learn from humanity.
Author: Laylah
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Cronus/Kankri, Cronus/Dirk
Rating: Explicit
Length [Total]: 1:43:41
Music: Starve The Ego, Feed The Soul (R/D remix) by The Glitch Mob
Cover: Opalsong
Summary:
"If you feel that need to dominate—to be in charge, to win—then this is actually a pretty safe way of dealing with that," Dirk says, looking you in the eyes. It doesn't sound like a general, impersonal 'you' at all. "You get what you want and so does your partner. It's not a lot like the bullshit you see in the media."

"But I sh—it's not right to want that," you say, and by now your nerves are thrumming with an echo of the same panic you felt in Cronus's apartment.

Dirk shrugs. "You can spend your whole life trying to make yourself normal, whatever the fuck that actually means, or you can accept how you're different and start looking for ways to be happy."

Part 2 of the Human Behavior series.

Links [Length; Size]:
Chapter 1 [37:07; 34.3]
Chapter 2 [16:51; 15.7]
Chapter 3 [32:48; 30.3]
Chapter 4 [16:55; 15.8]
Series Podbook [2:26:48; 70.3MB]
Archive Link
Series Archive Link

Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3

POINTS: [total] 170
Cronus: embrace humanity. (5+10) * 3 = 45
Kankri: learn from humanity. (5 +10+10) * 5 = 125


opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong


Title: cola with the burnt-out taste
Author: callunavulgari
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck/Percy Jackson and the Olympians
Pairings: Gen
Rating: Mature
Length: 3:03
Size: 3.0 MB
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: He’s Dave motherfuckin’ Strider. He saved two—no, three, kind of—universes and has made out with aliens, okay? He has made time his bitch, died for his cause time and time again, and had an ultimate rap off with an Insane Clown Posse wannabe while the fucker was on a murder spree. He doesn’t give two shits what other people think of him.

Links: mp3
Archive Link

Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3

POINTS: (5+10+10+10) * 1 = 35
opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong


Title: Dave: Seduce Evil Karkat
Author: Laylah
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Dave/Karkat
Rating: Mature
Length: 14:19
Size: 13.3 MB
Music: This Too Shall Pass by Ok Go
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: The sensible thing would be to get out of here and revert to plan "avoid everyone until we're through this bubble." You've seen how scary-violent trolls can get. On the other hand, Karkat. You've been increasingly aware of your own Karkat as a potential makeouts friend for months now, which might be just a lack of other options who aren't a) your ex, b) your sister, c) dating your sister, d) the Mayor, or e) COMPLETELY PSYCHO, but despite the poor reasoning it's still a thing. Your Karkat has seemed pretty oblivious. Evil Karkat, though....

Links: mp3
Archive Link

Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3

POINTS: (5+10) * 2 = 30
code_switch: (Default)
[personal profile] code_switch
A blurry city street through a rainy window.

Title: London Rain

Author: paratactician
Reader: codeswitch
Rating: Teen and up
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Dave/Rose
Summary: Years after the world returns to normal, Dave takes Rose on a short vacation, for reasons not even he quite understands.
Length: 52:35 
Download: mp3 at Soundcloud

Crossposted to AO3

[5+10] x 4 = 60
rhea314: hairdryer gwen (with this hairdryer)
[personal profile] rhea314

Title: Collegiate Swamp Cartography
Author: LaughingStones
Reader: Rhea314
Fandom: Homestuck
Character: Cronus Ampora/Gamzee Makara, Gamzee Makara & Karkat Vantas
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: rape/non-con. This is a story dealing with sexual assault and its aftermath. There's a lot more aftermath than assault, since I like my hurt/comfort heavy on the comfort, but if you have triggers or trauma, please be careful.
Summary: Gamzee goes to a party, runs into a good-looking senior, and finds himself in a mess. Fortunately this short, shouty guy gets him out of it and talks him through the hard stuff.
Text: here
Length 01:24:11
Link: here



Title: A True Friend is a Compass
Author: LaughingStones
Reader: Rhea314
Fandom: Homestuck
Character: Gamzee Makara & Karkat Vantas
Rating: Teen and Up
Warnings: no archive warnings apply
Summary: Gamzee's taking dance. Karkat is startled to find he's... not as hopeless at it as described. Gamzee is equally startled.
You can't get better unless you have an accurate idea of where you're starting from, and sometimes having an unflinchingly honest friend really helps.
Text: here
Length 0:09:25
Link: here



Title: Roadblocks and Detours
Author: LaughingStones
Reader: Rhea314
Fandom: Homestuck
Character: Kankri Vantas & Karkat Vantas
Rating: Teen and Up
Warnings: no archive warnings apply
Summary: The Vantas twins have been on less than civil terms for most of a year. Now Kankri wants to talk.
Text: here
Length 0:22:29
Link: here

opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong


Title: john: get the last word
Author: VastDerp
Producer/Director: Opalsong
Performers: AshesandGhost & liobi
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: John/Dave
Rating: Explicit
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: just two hormonal teenaged boys talking about their dicks.

Productions [length; size]:
LIVE version [35:35; 32.8MB]
Pre-recorded version [36:05; 33.2MB]

Audiofic Archive link: Here


This project was created for Theatipod 2015. We got together once a week to rehearse and at the end performed the project live for an audience. This was an amazing experience. Due to technical issues, the live performance was not recorded. However, we recorded a back up previously that has good sound quality. Also, serendipitously we recorded the tech rehearsal which we ran with the other Theatripod group and you can hear them as the audience.

Thanks to Bessyboo for the amazing Theatripod graphic used in the cover.

Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3

MODS: can I get a tag for liobi? (also I don't know how you want to credit me as producer/director)
rhea314: blonde hair (blonde)
[personal profile] rhea314
Title: With Our Skins Off
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Rhea314
Fandom: Homestuck
Character: Gamzee & Karkat
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Warnings: no archive warnings apply
Summary: You can't control your lungs. It's ridiculous, this is just a bit of rope, you could bite or claw through it if you tried hard enough (no you couldn't, he's too good at this.)
Tags: nonsexual bondage, pale romance, pale porn, comfort angst, catharsis
Text: here
Length 0:04:42
Link: here

5+10 x 1 = 15
opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong


Title: Lessons in Smooth Motherfuckology
Author: Cephied_Variable
Readers: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: John/Dave
Rating: Teen
Length: 27:17
Size: 25.0MB
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: “John, when you were eleven you didn’t even know what sex was. If you did, you would not have clicked on that link for two girls one cup. Twice.”

This is the straightest most bro-est make out session that ever happened. Not even a little bit of it is gay. Nope.

Links: mp3
Archive Link

This was recorded back in 2012 when I was in the throes of Homestuck fandom. I just got permission to podfic it :D I am pleased to say that I think it holds up well!

Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3
resonance_and_d: headphones and the word podfic (podfic by me)
[personal profile] resonance_and_d
Title: And, trying to unfold for you, was brittle
Author: signalbeam
Reader[personal profile] resonance_and_d  
Rating: T
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings(s): Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Archive Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence
Summary: Sometimes your life gets flipped like a table when a meteor smashes into a mountain, murderous bugs move into your backyard, and a rainbow drinker breaks into your house. It’s (probably) not your fault that any of this happens, but it (probably) is your fault for reacting to it by rigging your cat's mausoleum with hidden cameras. Or: Rose Lalonde the Vampire Slayer.
Length/Size: 03:42:02 (104.39MB m4b, 127MB mp3)
 
link to mp3: here
link to m4b: here
opalsong: (podfic)
[personal profile] opalsong

Title: Breaking to Saddle
Author: Asuka Kureru
Reader: Opalsong
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairings: Karkat/Equius
Rating: Explicit
Length: 53:22
Size: 49.0
Cover: Opalsong
Summary: Karkat takes his time; this trick he has learned from several drill sergeants and then from being a drill sergeant, and learned well. When you're not sure what the fuck to do with a subordinate, take your time thinking it out. There is almost no way they will notice you're completely lost at sea: they'll be too busy freaking out. It's a technique he could have used more of when he was a kid.

He really has no idea what to do with the guy.
--
Sequel to Uniform Kink [PODFIC], a pesterlog/cybersex fic in which Karkat accidentally gets Equius hot under the collar with mentions of the uniform that comes with his promotion, and then decides to run with it.
--
Now with Equius POV epilogue! 2000% more fluff.

Links: mp3
Archive Link


Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

cross posted at amplificathon, my journal, and AO3
skyunicorn: (Default)
[personal profile] skyunicorn
Title: Fingers Crossed
Author: [archiveofourown.org profile] SkyUnicorn
Reader:[archiveofourown.org profile] SkyUnicorn
Fandom: Homestuck
Pairing: Karkat Vantas/Gamzee Makara
Rating: General Audiences
Summary: Karkat gets roped into a game of Trollian Sardines and is stuck spending the evening in close quarters with his flush crush.
Length: 00:07:04

Download: MP3 | Size: 6 MB :: M4b | Size: 8 MB
Text & Podfic: HERE


(Homestuck 5+Pairing 5+First Podfic during Amp10)* 1= 20 points
**Total Points:341

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